Saturday, November 17th and Sunday, November 18th, 2007

                                        Topics

Saturday, November 17^th, 2007

The importance of the family in society in the Islamic perspective – 40 min lecture 

Subjects can include the role of the family as a stabilizer in society, the role of the family as a foundation for the practical ethical and spiritual education of the individual, and the problems that can occur when the family is undermined.

Balancing faith, work, and family – the example of the Prophet and his household – 40 min lecture

In this lecture, can focus on the example of the prophet and the ahlilbayt and how they balanced the demands of religion, of work/community service, and home life.  With particular emphasis on the household of the prophet (saws) and the household of Ali (as) and Fatimah (as).

Important issues in conception and pregnancy – 45 min lecture          

 Recommended supplications or actions related to conception and pregnancy.  Islamic teachings about mental and spiritual state one should try to achieve in trying to conceive, importance of the environment of the woman during pregnancy in terms of eating well, sleeping well, but also her mental outlook, her spiritual outlook, negative effects of stressful home situation, importance of husband helping out to avoid stress of the mother to be, etc.

Workshop #1 – 45 minutes

Adapting to change: A new family begins

The start of a new family is an exciting and life-changing experience.  It is one however involving many challenges.  This workshop attempts to examine some of these challenges, including some particular to the Islamic context.

A. Women’s issues related to childbirth and nursing (sisters only)

A chance to examine some of the relevant issues related to childbirth and nursing.  Fiqh issues about bleeding related to childbirth, ritual purification (ghusl), resuming prayers; Islamic teachings on breastfeeding.  An opportunity to examine important Islamic issues related to childbirth and nursing and for sisters who have given birth to discuss experiences for the benefit of those who have not

B. Important points for new parents – aqeeqah, circumcision, choosing a name, adhaan and iqamah, sunnahs involved

An examination of some of the important Islamic obligations and sunnah recommendations on new parents.  Aqeeqah, circumcision for male children, choosing a good name, and other sunnahs involved, other basic advice for new parents.

C. Maintaining the couple foundation

With the challenges of the work involved in caring for a new baby and for young children in general, and with all the other demands on our time and our physical and mental energies, it is hard for a husband and wife to find time for each other.  However, it is important that they be able to do so, as the strength of the family rests on the strength of the marriage.  In this workshop, the importance of finding time for intimacy is to be discussed and suggestions given for how to find more time for this, as well as discussions of what we mean by “intimacy;” the idea that intimacy is more than just sexual relations.

Importance for adults and older youth to act responsibly with good akhlaq to set a good example for those younger.  Importance for older siblings to set a good example for younger siblings – 40 minute lecture

Families are at the center of efforts to instill ethics in youth.  However, the family does not exist in a vacuum.  Youth are exposed to the examples of many people other than their parents.  What is more, youth tend to pay more heed to actions as an example rather than words.  Therefore, the behavior of older youth and adults in the community around them go a long way in terms of reinforcing the moral education given by the parents.  This goes as well in the family, with older siblings needing to set a good example, and parents needing to “practice what they preach.”

Workshop #2 – 45 min

Building a strong base: raising younger children

The early years of the life of a child forms an important foundation period.  This workshop examines some of the important points involved in setting a good foundation to prepare to build the next generation

A. Importance of men in childrearing

Examination of the importance of the male figure in the household in raising children, the need for men to be involved actively in their children’s lives, both for male and female children, need for men to assist with the caring of younger children so as not to overburden the wife

B. Disciplining children, different parenting styles, establishing a sense of responsibility in children

Examination of some different parenting styles in terms of discipline, dealing with different tendencies in terms of styles of parenting between the husband and wife, the importance of showing a united front in terms of discipline.  Establishing responsibility and discipline in children, involving children in chores, etc.

C. Developing and preserving Islamic identity in children

Examination of ideas for how to nurture an Islamic identity in children, importance of this, importance of starting early, importance of setting a good example by practicing what you preach, the importance of having spiritual development being a “family matter,” “the family that prays together, stays together.”

Sunday, November 18^th, 2007

Workshop  #3

 The impact of the greater society on the family as an institution and what we can do to counter that influence

The environment outside the door of our homes can have a powerful influence on our lives.  This environment and its influences present many challenges for any family trying to develop and maintain itself on Islamic principles, or religious moral principles in general, for that matter. The purpose of this workshop is to examine some of the challenges posed by the society at large on different members of the family.

A .  Difficulties faced by mothers ( for women only)

Some of the difficulties include conflicts over the roles of women and mothers in the society, the pressures to balance education, work, and motherhood, conflicts between pictures of “womanhood” promoted by the society at large and by the Muslim community, reconciling these conflicts

B. Difficulties faced by youth from societal influences (for youth)

Some of the difficulties include peer pressure, the influence of media, advertising, challenges to keep a religious and spiritual identity with the influence of friends and acquaintances at school, work, and elsewhere, and for older youth, the challenges of the entrance into adulthood, including interactions with the other gender, reconciling Islamic norms with the ultraliberal norms of this society

C. Challenges faced by fathers due to societal challenges (for older men /fathers)

Challenges include the demands of career and the striving to meet material needs and balancing this with responsibilities as a father and a husband and in terms of spiritual development to be an example for children, the challenge of successfully ignoring the overcharged sexuality of the everyday environment

How our community centers can better help to serve families and the next

generation; how centers can better serve the needs of youth – 45 minutes

lecture

Traditionally, the raising of children is seen as a community obligation, rather

than a task solely the responsibility of the parents.  In our communities, local

community organizations and mosques share part of the responsibility in the

moral development of the community.  These centers should play a part in the

raising of the next generation.  However, very often, the existing centers are not doing what they need to be doing to serve the needs of the youth.  The purpose of this lecture is to examine the current state of community center programming and to look at what changes need to be done to better serve their responsibilities to help raising the next generation.

Workshop #4 – 45 min

Weathering the storm: raising older children

The adolescent years are a turbulent time that is difficult for the youth living through the changes involved, and almost as difficult again for the parents and other adults in the community striving to guide these budding adults safely through these challenging years.  This workshop examines some of these struggles and attempts to look at ways to more smoothly sail these rough waters.

A.Talking to children about alcohol, drugs, sex, peer pressure: helping children to resist temptations

In this society, our youth are exposed to many improper influences. The idea of this workshop is for parents to discuss the challenges they face as parents in helping their children to deal with these temptations and to offer advice on how to approach talking to your children about these matters.  The importance of an overall atmosphere of good communication and trust between parents and children and how to develop that

B. Television, video games, internet/computers – establishing a balance and being a smart and aware parent in terms of monitoring what your children are exposed to

Examining the issue of children spending too much time with TV, video games, internet and computers.  These technologies can bring important information to us, and can be educational media, or they can be media of corruption.  The importance of keeping aware of what your children are looking at being exposed to through TV, videogames, internet, Internet Messaging, etc.  Keeping tabs without spying.  The importance and necessity of being involved in your children’s lives.

C. Balancing between being necessarily protective of children and being smothering; finding a balance

There are many dangers facing youth growing up today.  As parents, it is our job to protect our children.  At the same time, however, part of our job is to prepare them to be responsible adults equipped with the independence and skills to navigate the world on their own.  How to find that balance.  The importance of trust and communication and how to build these.

Maintaining family unity, communication and conflict resolution – 50 min panel discussion

All speakers will take questions and engage in discussion regarding the importance of keeping family unity, tactics for resolving conflicts in the family between parents and children, and the importance of a strong relationship and strong communication in allowing for this.  Tips on developing strong communication.

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